Good morning guys!
I hope y’all are doing well and crushing your goals! I want to first start off by apologizing for the lack of blog post recently. As some of you know, I was in the middle of moving and I started a new job last week as well, so it’s been hectic to say the least. While I was emptying boxes I found a little something that brought me back to a few years ago. I had a flashback to 2010 about 4 and a half years ago when I was truly struggling to lose weight and how bad I felt at the time. Well, tell us what did you find? I found my little Weight Watchers weight loss booklet. Having said this you’re probably thinking, what’s wrong with that? Here’s what’s wrong, I didn’t make it very far and wasn’t very successful at all. There are two entries in this booklet. One of which is my starting weight of 154.2 lbs and the second entry is my very first weigh in. I remember being on program and “starving”. I was only allowed to eat somewhere around 23 points which is equal to about 1200 calories. That week I followed program, I ate what I was supposed to and skipped what I wasn’t. I had worked so hard only to find out that my new weight was exactly 155 lbs a difference of +0.8 lbs. Some of you may be saying that’s nothing, it’s normal, weight fluctuates, you’re a woman with woman parts and hormones galore. But for a 19 year old who had no idea what health and fitness really was, nor how to achieve it. Times were tough. So tough that I never went back. I remember feeling so bad about myself because according to Weight Watchers, I failed that week. I felt like i failed because all of the progress that you make is determined by a freaking number on a dumb scale. That scale had no idea what I had accomplished that week, maybe I gave up my favorite junk food, perhaps I lost an inch on my waist, perhaps i ran for a minute straight or PR on a lift, maybe my pants fit a little looser. These are all things that the scale can’t see, measure or calculate.
I don’t remember clearly how I got back into it but I most likely had a cry and felt sorry for myself. I would like to say that Weight Watcher is not a bad program and for some it works very well, I also like the idea of their new program, where fruits and veggies are zero points. I also have to say that I did follow the program after I picked myself back up, I followed it on my own. My new starting weight was 156 lbs, I did weekly at home weigh ins and kept track in a journal. The biggest reason why I went back on program was because of my mom, she was also following Weight Watchers and had been very successful with a weight loss of close to 50 lbs. I knew that it worked because I was seeing results in front of my face. For the next 3 months, I worked my buns off (literally!), I stayed on program and within my daily points allowance. I worked out 6 days a week. And within 3 months I had lost almost 30 pounds. During these three months, there were times where I would weigh myself and just cry. I remember this one week precisely; I was all excited to weigh myself because I thought that I had done so well that week and I wanted so badly to have a bowl of cereal for breakfast but that bowl of cereal was going to be my treat for having lost weight that week. I had been looking forward to this for a full week, ridiculous, I know. Much to my despair I hadn’t lost any weight, so no cereal for me. Honestly when I think back to those times, I feel really bad. I feel bad for myself for having to go through those times, but what I feel most sadness about is that there are probably millions of people worldwide that are going through that same exact thing. Now days, when I feel like eating something I eat it, I don’t restrict or deprive myself, but I’ve changed that kind of junk food that i go for. I eat dark chocolate instead of milk chocolate, for example. And i don’t eat all of it in one sitting, I can control myself. I’ll have to do another post for more on how I now manage to control myself.
No one teaches you that everyone loses weight at a different pace, everyone’s metabolism isn’t the same, weight fluctuates from week-to-week, muscle weighs more than fat and by working out you might weigh more without looking bigger. No one tells you that you are not defined by a number on a scale or a number or letter on the tag of your pants or shirt. Society actually tells us that we are THOSE number, if we exceed a certain number we are classified as this or that. Over the last four years I have learnt that weight loss, health and fitness mean different things and work differently for everyone. Everyone’s body is composed differently and everyone carries weight differently. There is not one program that will work the same for everyone. Our bodies all work in different ways and on their own terms. It is important to do some research and find out what would work best for you and if its not working don’t be afraid to look for something else. For me it was intuitive clean eating and running and lifting. I stopped counting calories and focusing more on my health and what that meant. I became more aware of what I was putting into my body. I finally realized that I didn’t just want to be “skinny” but I wanted to be healthy, I wanted to live a long, healthy and happy life and I didn’t want to struggle with dieting for the rest of my life.
Fast forward to 2014, I have lost and maintained 40 lbs for a year and a half now. I haven’t weighed myself for quite a while and have no need to. I also would like mention that I eat probably about twice as many calories now than I did while on program with Weight Watchers. To be very honest 1200 calories is NOT enough for any adult especially if you’re active. Twelve hundred calories is what a 10 year old should be eating, not a grown woman. I struggled with weight loss in the beginning because my body was simply doing its job and trying to protect me from “starvation” by storing everything I was eating as fat. I believe one hundred percent of your success will be based on education, learn to love and listen to your body, it speaks much louder than you could ever think. When it comes to picking what foods to eat or if you should count calories I always say it’s pretty darn hard to count calories off of foods that don’t have any labels. Instead of eating “empty” calories, reach for a fruit or raw veggies. Also remember that calories are energy, your body needs calories to do the things you want it to do. If you feed yourself clean foods that are rich in nutrients and are in the most natural form your body knows exactly what to do with these foods. Don’t be afraid to eat because you’re over your “daily calorie limit.” Listen to your body and give it what it needs. Also bodies can’t tell time so whether you’re eating at noon or midnight your body can’t tell.
In closing, I want to say that you can do this!! Weight loss is a journey and it has wonderful moments and not so wonderful moments. You will feel great then you will feel defeated. While you’re going through this roller coaster remember that you have your entire life to reach your goal weight. You are not a failure because you gained half a pound this week. Just as you are not a failure if you lost “only” half a pound. Stay positive, keep going and never give up! You’re beautiful whether you weigh 220 lbs or 120 lbs. Love yourself no matter how big or small you are because whenever you lose the weight you will be the exact same person just in a reshaped body!
I hope you have a great week!